What Works with our Family

Last night I took the time to post on the things that I have learned do not work with Wayne. Autism was not a word in our life for the first 6 years of life, therefore, it has never become an excuse for his behaviors that are not socially acceptable. I have learned in trying to retrain him or in trying to help him modify behaviors several tricks.

1. ALWAYS HAVE A REPLACEMENT BEHAVIOR: My favorite example of this is the flapping. Flapping is not socially acceptable, nor was it ever ok in my house. Stemming (the term I learned later) was. So, I worked with Wayne over several months on how to stem without the world knowing he is bothered. So, when Wayne "flaps" he flaps like a penguin, because he is not a bird that can fly without an airplane. Another example is one that one of his teachers did with him this year. Instead of letting Wayne cover his ears for fire drills, he has allowed Wayne to wear headphones during the drill. It is cool to listen to music in head phones it is not cool to walk around covering your ears.

2. WATCH WHAT HE EATS: This is our newest revelation. He is scared of color, and can tell you what happens if he has artificial color. Yellow #5 is the worst! He also has a reaction to preservatives and high fructose corn syrup. I see you are thinking, "geeze, what does this kid eat?" He eats all types of the food. But he eats FOOD! If we cannot read the label and recognize the ingredients as food, we do not eat it. Check out my recipe page to see what we do eat.

3. MAKE A SCHEDULE AND STICK TO IT: This is the hardest for me. I like to make it up as I go along and wing it. Yes, it adds chaos to life, but having every minute of the day planned is overwhelming to me. Wayne, however, needs everything planned and needs to know what is going to happen each step of the way. He has to have a steady schedule with few/no surprises. This has been key to his success at school as well as at home. It gets lost sometimes on holidays, but as the years progress, I slowly remember to give him a quick agenda and run down on the day.

4. MAKE A LIST: This seems weird but checklists do work. He has a checklist for getting ready in the morning. He has a checklist for getting ready for bed at night. There is even a checklist on how to use the potty. I think we have a checklist for just about everything. After he has done the exact same routine about 30 times, the checklist slowly disappears.